i admit it: occasionally, i’m a footprint-checker.
it’s always kind of jarring (in a good way) to see who reads. i get people from san fransisco and washington d.c.; austrailia and hong kong.
i’m used to the regularity of seeing texas and kansas as well, of course … they are all part of the “norm.”
but then, i see this:
lololol! who reads this from russia?
awesome.
my quest for world domination is well underway, it seems.
ewww! sweaty schrute back!
the office = greatness.
… it’s only a matter of time, hillary.
congrats obama team!
*foresees obama/edwards ticket*
alex and i are approaching a year of wedded bliss, and almost five more of a near picture-perfect relationship.
even still, my mind occasionally wanders to possibility of eventual loneliness.
allow me to elaborate.
i’m the type of person that can read or watch something, and instantly imagine how that situation would impact my life. as a child of divorce, i’ve seen what broken homes can do to a family. despite this, i don’t worry about being left for another woman. i don’t even worry about being left “just because” … at least, i don’t worry about it anymore. however, i contemplate other “what ifs” from time to time …
life isn’t fair
God works in mysterious ways. i have no idea how he chooses how and when a person will die, nor do i want to. that is his Divine right as the Creator to decide. that said, it still doesn’t make it fair when a person is killed in the prime of their life.
freak accidents: a daddy-to-be dies on a late night run to satisfy his pregnant wife’s hankering for ice cream. a woman killed on the way to her daughter’s dance recital.
car crashes. bullets. explosions. war. terrorism. earthquakes. floods.
the randomess of it all is up to chance, but it’s one you take each day to live.
take randy pausch, for example.
he was dealt a bittersweet hand, to be sure. after years of being single and building his dream career, he married the love of his life and had three children. just as he was realizing his own meaning and purpose in life, he was given a concrete death sentence in the form of incurable cancer. with only months to live, he is scrambling to get his family’s affairs in order while struggling to stay healthy as long as possible.
every few days, he posts his status on his website. he is very candid about his progress: his kidneys are slowly failing; his tumor count is in the hundreds, increasing daily. how can he have the strength to prepare for death? equally as curious: how can his wife, jai, find the strength to live when part of her life stops? the strength is in everyone, i’m sure, but to be able to draw from it —and continue to be grateful — is the challenging part.
a fate worse than death
memories are made to be shared and remembered. i am terrified to think that my life (and the lives around me) would be forgotten when the moment passes — that could be why i write and document as much as i do. i want to remember everything, and i want my family to be able to do the same. i couldn’t even imagine forgetting my first kiss … the way alex looked when he proposed … my wedding day … the day i got my first “real” job. losing memories, to me, is a fate worse than death.
seventeen years ago — and after almost forty years of marriage — sandra day o’connor‘s husband discovered he had alzheimer’s.
for john o’connor it began quietly, with memory difficulties that became progressively serious. last year, it was reported that he had forgotten his wife and fell in love with someone else. their son was quoted as saying that “for mom to visit when he’s happy … visiting with his girlfriend, sitting on the porch swing holding hands,” was a relief to her.
the thought of watching my husband carry on day-to-day — not only with no memory of the decades spent together, but to see him spend it with another woman — just crushes me. as far as i have read, she doesn’t speak to him about their past to avoid confusion. she is a much braver and stronger woman than i.
another story that has affected my thoughts come in the form of the fictitious novel/movie “the notebook.”
the heart-wrenching tale centers around noah and allie, as he tries desperately to remind her of the love she had forgotten due to alzheimer’s. each day, he reads “the story of their love” — which she had put together before her memory loss — to her. in the end (and this differs from the book, i know), she remembers him for the final time, and together they drift away to a peaceful death in each other’s arms.
alex and i watched the movie together a few years ago. we both cried, a lot. it affected our thoughts in different ways, but we came away from it with a joint-resolution. we promised that:
child-like promises that we may not be able to fulfill — but in a weird way — it comforts us both to know how we picture our ending … together.
it amazes me that i continue to stumble across the most random sites imaginable. case in point: windowshoppingforwomen.com
their mission? teach other (socially awkward) men how to attract women to their networking site … and their bed! they boast results of up to 40 messages per week.
crazy, right?
their service is free — the awkward pictures of their conquests … priceless.
if you’re interested in:
• sharing your overhaul details
• writing thoughtful, on-topic posts
• finding buddies to keep you on-track
• motivating others to become healthy
• losing weight without losing your mind
• gaining writing experience
… then this is for you!
sorry, ladies, there’s no money involved … the payoff will be in your decreased pant size. : )
i think it’s a really cool idea to have multiple stories of motivation presented …
if so, message me with the basic info:
• name
• age
• location
• weight loss goal
• writing experience (if any)
• overhaul plan
• why you want to do this
i can’t wait to hear from you!
http://www.guyforceshiswifetodressinagarbagebagforthenextthreeyears.com/
lol, i love HIMYM. every time they mention a bizarre url, it actually WORKS! here are some pictures from the slideshow, for your enjoyment.
when will it end? (and when will they find better stories to focus on?!)
woman pregnant with 18th child
omg, the duggars are at it again …
a message from sammyjo_1:
“My xanga friends.. I know you have
seen my last post… and what looked like an easy win has now turned to
a battle for the best! Our competition is slowly closing in on us. We
have till midnight tonight to lock in our votes! If you all have not
voted yet, I bet you, let your voice be heard. If you have already
voted, thank you! I still could use your help though….
Here is how… vote from home, work, library, neighbors, relatives… just vote as much as you can!
Write
a blog… tell them my story, get your buddies to vote for us too. Send
an email, a desperate plea from yours truly…. any sympathy vote I can
get I will. I promise I will give 1,000 xanga credits to any of my
friends who (while I have them… I only have 5,000) post my plea in
their blog and have two friends confirm they voted!!!!!
I am
desperate and really want to win. I have only a few good photos in my
house of our wedding and this photo just happens to be our favorite but
it is sooo expensive to order it from our photographer.
Just go to: www.dawnsparks.com
, click on the blog side, scroll down to the blog about the best
wedding kisses, and then vote for your favorite picture. I hope that is
number 9. 
Thank you so much for your support! I really appreciate
it!
Anything you can do…. I would be honored!!!!! AND I owe you my first born. Hehe… it was worth a shot.”
